Thank you, fear, for being such a powerful teacher, for waking me at night with heart tremors, for unplugging me from my source, for taking on the illusion of bills to pay, a business to grow, a book to write, children to provide for, a husband dying of cancer, a boyfriend leaving, and terrifying self doubt. Such magnificent lessons!
God bless you, fear, for getting my attention more than everything, more than anyone, more than love, more than joy. You found me when no one else could. You sought me out, pushed me into corners, made me weep, made me angry, and broke me in half. Finally, fear, you broke me wide open….
And for that moment of total surrender to the divine, I am deeply grateful. Only then did I embrace my soul again and step fully into the light – refusing to ever go back into your dungeon, refusing to ever be your prisoner again.
Fear, my old friend, I recognize you now when you come to me in the night, disguised as bills, illness, heartbreak, grief or disappointment. – I recognize you, master of disguises. I recognize you by the stirring in my gut as you approach, the quickening of my heart rate, the frantic pacing of my thoughts. Ah ha! It is only you!
And you, fear, are not real…
You are the boogeyman I planted in my closet. The one I told to awaken me in the night so I would learn to dance with you instead of scream and cry. So I would learn to use you as fuel to help me reach my next level. So I would see ultimately that you are my friend, my fertilizer, my divine companion on this journey to rediscover my soul.
I embrace you, fear, because without you I would be nowhere. I would never have jumped off my first cliff into the unknown. I would never have stepped into my first terrifying adventure that changed everything. I would never have found my voice. Because without you, fear, I would still be sleeping….
You can stay in the closet or you can dance with me. It makes no difference. My light cannot be diminished. It never could. But it took you showing up for me to discover that.
Now I love you so much, fear, that I can’t find you – no matter how hard I look. My love has destroyed you, flooded your darkness, washed away your disguises, illuminated every crevice where you once hid.
When I turn to face you, I only see divine order in your place. I only feel my burning heart pulsing with gratitude, my arms stretching up to grasp the hand that lifts me into the light.
When bad news first arrives, it feels like the wind has been knocked out of you; it’s a punch to the gut.
This moment is a great blessing. This is the brief and sudden moment of calm while your ego mind is stunned into silence.
It’s the holy moment of grace when you can listen to and hear your own powerful intuition, your higher self. It whispers inside: “This is all going to be okay. Something better is waiting for you. This is all in divine order for your highest good.”
That’s the voice of your soul’s wisdom, your divinity, speaking up because your ego has been delivered a swift blow and is temporarily stunned.But very soon, within minutes, the ego mind fires back up and begins whispering:
“How did this happen? This isn’t fair! Life is meaningless…”
Recently I had an amazing interview with Mary Treacy O’Keefe, listen in.
We come to earth to evolve our souls, then we return to the divine realm after we die. When people cross over, the spirit continues and we survivors can connect with our loved ones. This realization changes everything about grief. Intuition enables us to make these connections. Meditation helps quiet the left brain mind and develop our intuition.
- Ideas for how to help grieving family and friends
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You either believe in divine order or you don’t. It’s an all or nothing thing. Either you’re aware that all events occur for your soul’s growth, your highest good, and the highest good of all – or life feels chaotic, painful and meaningless.
Each day provides opportunities to shift back and forth between those two views until you fully align with the view that empowers you most and moves your life in a positive direction. Only then can you fulfill your soul’s mission and live up to your greatest potential.
You may find yourself saying, “Things happen for a reason” when you get a new job, your business is thriving, you fall in love, have a baby, or gain recognition. You slip on the lens of divine order at those moments and offer gratitude to a loving God or a divine universe that operates for your highest good.
When things aren’t going so well; when you lose that great job, when you’re facing bankruptcy, your spouse divorces you, or your child dies in a tragic accident – you may feel angry at a God who could cause such cruel suffering, or you may rage at an unjust universe where tragic events unfold for no reason.
This is your awakening moment – when your soul is being pushed to the next level of your growth – which is exactly what you agreed to experience before this lifetime began. It’s also when you find out if you’re living from your soul’s perspective, your divine view, or from your ego self. Read more
Whenever we’re experiencing deep loss or illness, we stop dreaming. We only focus on the pain and the past. Have you ever seen a dog lick its wound obsessively and thus prevent healing? That’s what we do with our pain.
It’s okay to do this for a little while. But recognize that it’s not helping you. In order to make things in your life get better – you have to start dreaming of what you want next.
When a loved one has died, we sometimes feel like we’re betraying them if we move on and stop licking the wound. This is clearly not the case. Your loved one is watching you from the other realm and desperately wants you to let go and be happy again. Releasing your attachment is the greatest gift you can give someone who has passed on. Bless them on their way to the higher realms.
If you could have a conversation with your deceased loved one, he or she would tell you that your grief hurts them too. Your painful attachment prevents them from moving on to the great adventure awaiting them in the higher realms.
When my husband died, Chief Fools Crow (who was in North Dakota and miles from civilization) hiked to a phone booth in order to call our mutual contact in Denver – who then called me in Boulder and said, “Paul has passed on now, and the spirit guides are guiding him to higher realms. But if you wallow in your grief, you’ll prevent him from moving on to where he needs to go to find peace.”
This phone call greeted me the moment I returned home from the hospital after Paul had died. His words truly helped me; I didn’t want to hurt Paul by holding onto my grief.
If the person you’re grieving over is still alive, but they’ve chosen not to be in a relationship with you – you have only one option.
Throughout the day, say this to yourself:
“Okay, I wasn’t being my brilliant self. My energy was terrible, so she (or he) left me. Now I am doing everything in my power to raise my energy. I will soon attract him (or someone greater) into my life.”
Remember, life is simply an energy contest. The person with the best energy always attracts the life and love they want.